Oak and Eye chapter four hundred

there was this high pressure storm or something. the beginnings of one. it didn't really culminate into anything, but in the early evening i felt it holding onto me like a sucking frog after i rode my bike home. Erica let me go early and I owe her one for it. I took a nap and woke up thinking that someone was knocking on my door and saying my name.
That kind of air pressure can throw me off. I think it can throw other people off, too. I thought I wouldn't be able to find my way into it. Oh, this was last night. Panther was so different and so good. His sounds were jacked. Their sounds. Joe's in the band now too.
People were so loud and I was so into it. I carved my space. I made shit up and it worked. I leaned into the air pressure. I talked to morgan a little bit beforehand and that was helpful as well. overblowing a plastic recorder into a microphone feels so good.
OhSees played and they sounded so different this time! fast duh duh drum playing and I recognized some of the older songs played this new way. Ohsees are a really good band.
And recently a buncha shows with Ron and Jane in Janet Pants Dans Theeatre along with Tom Grimley who I have to actively resist romanticizing as one of the most perfect artists I've ever seen because that would make it into a distant story and not keep it as just this fucking amazing thing which a person has accomplished through obviously a lot of work. Those boxes are so clean and so alive. I dunno.. the whole thing.. It's just really challenging and inspiring.
Buddy show with Mattress, Bird Costumes, and Ora Cogan at Valentine's and I couldn't find my way into the music. I can usually roll past it, but that night it stuck and when I tried to roll past it, it just got jabbed in harder and sideways. I don't know why that happens. Sorry if I was weird to you. It was rough. The internal criterion. Everyone else played such beautiful sets. Mattress's new song about church that shit might be my favorite right now.
And the Junktown Junksale (thnx Cyrus) with Bird Costumes the next day was bright and redeeming. Was light and betweening and music in the daylight amongst a lot of sunshine and people's good-art-for-sale.
And the next night at Someday lounge for Au's and Modernstate's release party along with A Weather.. I played in the balcony through my tiny practice amp. "eschewed" the beautiful soundsystem? Well I dunno.. anyhow, I played so good I almost got distracted by the goodness of how I was playing. I found my way straight into it. Everyone was so good that night.
Oh and holy crap the Piss Mystics performance at Valentine's for Nathaniel's birthday along with Some Death Songs and Isle Hymnal.. Piss Mystics might be the best band I've ever played in. Razor's edge between transcendently amazing and abysmally horrible. So good. Dana and I process ideas at lightspeed. A Lemon Tree. I think this incarnation might be changing names, though.. Shit Dream.
Went to seattle and had (now) hilarious vehicular (locksmith) misadventures. But got to see Tom Grimley play again and also this dude called Red Squirrels who was so on. He was right there. Just right there. Oh and Last Slice of Butter were on the bill too! It was such a nice surprise to see Travis and Catalin.

So mostly I've been nailing my performances lately. Which is a matter of filling up those songs properly and being in them right and in the situation in which I am performing them. Well who knows whatever will happen but it has felt good lately. I'm not gonna play as insanely frequently, though.